When your child is battling addiction, gratitude can feel nearly impossible. Days are consumed by pain, fear, and uncertainty. Nights bring restless hours filled with worry. Watching someone you love become dependent on drugs—while not knowing if they will ever regain control of their life—can feel unbearable. Everything feels overwhelming, especially the fear of losing them.
When I was lost in my own darkness, someone suggested that I practice gratitude. At the time, it felt like a ridiculous idea…until I tried it.
In the beginning, it wasn’t easy. My mind constantly drifted back to worrying about my son. When that happened, I intentionally redirected my focus to the simplest things: a roof over my head, running water, air conditioning. It felt strange, and I wondered if I would need to search for things to be grateful for for the rest of my life. Still, I kept going.
Over time, this gratitude practice did two important things. First, it interrupted my spiraling thoughts. Second, it helped ground me in the present moment. As I continued, I began noticing more moments of gratitude throughout my day—and I started to recognize my own growth.
I learned that gratitude isn’t about denying pain. It’s about noticing moments of thankfulness alongside the pain. As I allowed gratitude into my heart, something softened. The hardships didn’t disappear, but I became more patient and compassionate with myself. I began to see beauty in days when I felt awful and wasn’t even looking for it. Gratitude helped me find small pockets of positivity when doubt felt overwhelming.
Eventually, I understood that practicing gratitude didn’t mean ignoring my pain. It showed me that pain and love can coexist. My heart could ache for my son while still finding joy in a walk outside or a quiet moment with a friend.
Through this practice, gratitude helped me reclaim parts of myself that had been lost to fear and worry. It reminded me that even in the darkest moments, there are still reasons to keep going, to keep believing, and to keep loving.
Looking back now, I see that gratitude didn’t change my circumstances—it changed me. It gave me the courage to face each day as it came.
A daily ritual that grounds me:
Each morning, I begin with a moment of gratitude by lighting a candle (see photo). I ask God to guide and protect my children. When I’m finished, I blow out the candle and imagine the smoke traveling to them—almost as if they’re inhaling it, cartoon-style. This simple daily practice of gratitude and intention helps ground me at the very start of my day.
Sheila L. is a proud single mom of three teenagers—two boys and one girl—and works full time as the Director of Event Sales at ZooTampa. She is a Certified Co-Active Coach (CPCC) and a Certified Divorce Coach, and also serves as a Peer Parent at Other Parents Like Me (OPLM), where she has discovered her “rocks”—a supportive community that has become a source of strength and guidance. Outside of work and OPLM, Sheila enjoys spending time with family and friends, as well as being outdoors. Some of her favorite activities include going to the beach, rowing, and playing tennis.